Restaurants

Bill's Place, an SF Institution

Burgers at Bill’s Place in one sentence: Legendary, landmark, local burger dinner joint that’s been an institution in the Outer Richmond for almost 40 years.

Who you’ll see there: Serious locals, working men sitting at the counter, families and neighborhood teens at the tables. If you don’t know about it, you’ll walk right by it.

Make sure to try: One of the celebrity burgers, like the Carol Doda (a famous SF topless dancer), which is two burgers, topless, side by side topped with an olive, or the Herb Caen, a burger topped with Monterey Jack cheese. The Paul Kantner comes with Thousand Island dressing. Also, you need a shake, which comes in a huge glass, plus the overflow, served in the stainless steel mixing cup.

Does anyone really bother with the garnish?

It’s okay to skip: The diet plate. You know you want the fries, they’re made on-site from actual potatoes and fried to practiced perfection.

Best dessert: Banana split or hot fudge sundae, if you inexplicably have any room left after the burger and fries.

Service: The same people have been working there for 40 years. They are friendly, efficient fixtures. You might get called “Hon”. Or they might be busy watching the Giants on the TV in the corner. Have some priorities, they do.

Average meal price: Starts at $6.50 for the Famous Bill’s Burger, Carol Doda is $9.00, Herb Caen is $7.50. Milk shake is $4.25, and you get free refills on your Coke.

Bill’s Place Logistics:

• Burger come med rare unless you specify something else
• You can pick potato salad or coleslaw, if you’re crazy enough to skip the fries
• In typical San Francisco fashion, there is a Japanese koi pond out on the back patio. Because every diner needs a koi pond.

Parking:

Street parking, meters, you might have to walk a block or two. There’s a lot a block away, but it hardly ever comes to that.

Location: Outer Richmond

2315 Clement Street
San Francisco, CA 94121
Phone: (415) 221-5262
Fax: (707) 824-0295

Hours:

Sunday to Thursday 11 a.m. -10 p.m.
Friday and Saturday 11 a.m. – 11 p.m.

Photos: Cat Lincoln

Curlys Coffee Chop in North Beach

Say what you will about this place but Curly’s Coffee Shop in North Beach holds a special place in my heart. First of all, I have always loved their classic American breakfasts with a Japanese twist. I used to walk over from Sunday services at Sts. Peter and Paul Church at Washington Square Park, often getting their french toast almost every week.

Secondly, I appreciate any cafe that can stick around this long in San Francisco without going under financially or being closed by the Health Department. And thirdly, I think they also kind of kick *ss for being such a long time North Beach “non-pasta related” merchant in a sea of excellent Italian cafes and restaurants. I mean, I think I have followed them around to at least three different addresses in a two-block radius of Columbus Avenue.

Today was a nice reminder that though I can’t walk here for breakfast anymore, I can still drive over and enjoy classic menu items like the french toast or one of their delicious omelettes!

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Cheeseburger, onion rings and a beer at Red's Java House.

If you are looking for a quick bite ‘n’ brew before the game, Red’s Java House in San Francisco is guaranteed score.

Located near the home of the San Francisco Giants, AT&T Ball Park in San Francisco, Red’s Java House grills up tasty burgers while you chug down cheap cold beer. Red’s is the spot for the hardcore Giants fans. Even the business hours vary depending on the game schedule. Every customer is wearing a Giants hat, a Giants jacket, a Giants shirts … they may have been wearing Giants underwear, but I couldn’t work up the courage to ask.

Served on a warm sourdough roll, the burgers are not the best burgers ever, but they are juicy and affordable, and the service is fast. If a burger is not on your scorecard, they also serve very popular fish and chips. Oh, and did I mention that you can get a bucket of beer — an actual metal pail filled with ice and six beers of your choice.

Another score for Red’s Java House is the outdoor seating. On a sunny afternoon in San Francisco, you can’t beat its location along the Embarcadero.

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The peppered bacon cheddar burger with fries at the Steelhead Brewing Company in Burlingame.

There are only a handful of destination restaurants in Burlingame. Steelhead Brewing Company is one of them.

My boyfriend David and I met up with his best buddy Joe at the Steelhead Brewing Company because we were in the mood for some beer and some meat. It was a Friday night, so we were mentally preparing ourselves for a hefty wait and were surprised when we got a table right away. It was all about timing, because you will most likely have to wait for a table on a Friday or Saturday night.

I ordered the grilled chicken breast sandwich, which was served on a whole wheat bun with a slightly spiced honey mustard sauce and crispy fries. I paired it with Steelhead’s Hairy Weasel Hefeweizen, which — let’s be honest — is just fun to order. “Yeah, I’ll have the Hairy Weasel” [snickering]. The beer was light and served with lemon. It was perfection with the grilled chicken breast. The fries were yummy. I inhaled all of my fries and most of David’s.

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I can be a bit of a bargain hunter when it comes to eating out at restaurants. I pride myself on finding quality restaurants with reasonable prices. I think I get it from my mom. One of my favorite finds on the Peninsula is Jack’s Prime in San Mateo. You see, Jack’s Prime has something called $10 Tuesdays, in which you can get a cheeseburger, milkshake and fries for — you guessed it — $10. It’s a pretty good deal.

A milkshake, cheeseburger and fries for $10 every Tuesday at Jack's Prime in San Mateo.

And just because it’s bargain night on Tuesdays doesn’t mean they skimp on the portions. My cheeseburger — made with hormone-free Meyer Ranch beef — was still juicy and hefty, and it came with plenty of fries. I almost didn’t have room for my creamy milkshake, featuring Double Rainbow ice cream and Clover organic milk. I got a mango milkshake, because, hey why not? I was feeling exotic. My boyfriend David went off the beaten bargain path slightly, pairing the delicious sweet potato fries for an additional $1.50 with his cheeseburger and chocolate milkshake.

Jack’s Prime is a bit of a regular haunt for David, who occasionally stops by for lunch. He made sure to mention that the homemade Ding Dong tastes pretty much like the regular ol’ Ding Dongs you got in your lunch as a kid. Also, the Jack’s Prime menu boasts deep-fried pickles, which I would never order (blech!), but David says are yummy. It’s certainly an unusual item to have on the menu.

If you are not a meat eater, don’t fret: During a previous visit, I ordered the Black Bean Burger — a house-made black bean and cilantro patty, with Jack cheese, roasted bell pepper mayo and tomatoes — and it was tasty. It wasn’t a meatless burger patty trying to taste like meat. Those are almost always so unsatisfying. Instead, this vegetarian option was flavorful and delicious.

If you can’t make it on a Tuesday, other deals at Jack’s Prime include six sliders for $10 on Thursdays, and Happy Hour Fridays with $12 pitchers and $3 wine from 3 p.m. to 7 p.m.

Jack’s Prime
3723 S El Camino Real
San Mateo, CA 94403
(650) 638-1479
Hours: Sunday through Thursday, 11 a.m. to 10 p.m.; 11 a.m. to 11 p.m. Friday and Saturday

Not your typical restaurant theme

I’d heard that GQ’s food writer Alan Richman called it the best burger in the country. I know Oprah flies down to Hollywood, Florida, to eat at this little joint.

So this trip, I decided to try it for myself: Le Tub on Ocean Drive just south of Johnson Street — in large part because I finally found the place, hiding behind a rickety fence.

Once you attract celebrities, your story gets out there. I was aware this local restaurant was once a Sunoco gas station and that the owner is the guy who thought up flying the Coppertone banner behind airplanes to advertise to sunbathers in South Florida. I could tell you it was decorated with bathtubs and toilets.

But I didn’t expect the dichotomies of this dockside restaurant. You can’t help but notice it’s a dump, and not in a theme-restaurant cutesy way, like a Dick’s Last Resort. I’m talking about wooden tables and seats that might not last through the meal. Be particularly wary of the the bench below the “Under Marsh Harbor JIB Room” sign — you will walk away with splinters in your ass, if you can stand up out of that hole at all.

Joey Campbell and Belle

The menu is handwritten, the staff brings their dogs to sit at the tables, they only accept cash and the menu mentions they prefer not to see kids after 8 p.m. No kidding. I heard the a few waiters throwing around the f-bomb and a nice four-letter s-word befitting the theme at 4:45 in the afternoon. Joey, the maintenance man, cleans tables by dumping the leftovers into the Intercoastal Waterway so diners can watch the fish bob for food.

And yet this establishment expects men to wear collared shirts in the evenings, and offers a parking attendant to watch your car. A wooden sign in the parking lot declares Le Tub is “an inexpensive for people with money,” which is your first warning you’re about to pay $12 for a cheeseburger. Not a cheeseburger, fries and Coke, mind you. Just the sandwich.

On the other hand, you’d be a bigger person than I if you could eat more than that. At 13 ounces, it comes out of the kitchen stacked so high, you can’t get your mouth around the whole thing. I’m guessing that’s why they included the plastic silverware. I’d have liked to salt my tomato slice, but I had to dump the clumped up salt out of the holes onto the table first.

Did I mention Le Tub is a real dive?

A cheeseburger in paradise?

But trust me, you’ll embrace these eccentricities if it means a chance at another burger like that. These guys know what medium rare means, and they make sure the Swiss cheese (or cheddar or American) is actually melted on there, not just slapped on and slightly warmed. The bun is so fresh, I think they baked it just before I wandered in. These burgers may not be everyone’s favorite, but it sure earned that “best” award with me.

But don’t say I didn’t warn you about that seating thing.

Le Tub Saloon

1100 N. Ocean Drive

Hollywood, Florida 33019

(954) 921-9425

My boyfriend David fancies himself a connoisseur of burgers, so, of course, I had to introduce him to Burgermeister in San Francisco. There are five Burgermeister locations (the Cole Valley, Castro and North Beach neighborhoods in San Francisco, Alameda and Daly City), yet somehow, this self-proclaimed burger master has managed to never eat at Burgermeister.

This location is right on the corner of the Cole and Carl streets in Cole Valley near a N-Judah Muni stop, so we decided to grab a burger at Burgermeister and then hop on the N-Judah to catch a movie downtown.

Cheeseburger and fries at Burgermeister.

The restaurant can get quite busy during lunch and dinner hours, but we got lucky and were able to grab a two-seater table. At Burgermeister, you order at the counter and they bring the food to your table. The staff is quite helpful in guiding you through the many options. “Is that sauce spicy?” “Is medium rare actually medium rare or is it really well done?”

David ordered a massive cheeseburger, fries and a chocolate milkshake. All the beef is Niman Ranch. I decided to skip the meat and got the garden burger, onion rings and vanilla milkshake. You have to get the milkshakes at Burgermeister. You have to. No ifs ands or buts. The milkshakes are made from Mitchell’s Ice Cream, a San Francisco instutition since 1953, and they are thick, creamy and heavenly.

David loved his burger; however, he said he would skip the peppercorn steak dip sauce on the side. Meanwhile, my garden burger was perfect, and I always love onion rings. These onion rings were delicious and not too greasy. It’s a lot of food, though, and we were positively stuffed when we were done. The meal was yummy, but not exactly healthy.

Afterwards, we were standing at the bus stop, waiting for the N-Judah and feeling sick from overeating.

Me: “I feel kinda gross. I shouldn’t have eaten all that.”

David: “Yeah, there’s no way to feel good about yourself after a meal like that.”

Burgermeister

86 Carl Street

San Francisco, CA 94117

Phone: (415) 566-1274

Hours: Daily 11 a.m. to 10 p.m.

I returned from a Mediterranean cruise earlier this month with two more bears from Hard Rock Cafe for my collection. They sit in the bay window of my office, watching me work morning, noon, night, weekends and holidays — a constant reminder of why I’ve parked my butt in this office chair to start with.

The latest additions

Well, that was the idea anyhow. Looking at the little ancient soldier from Rome reminds me this was the only place I stopped all day where the toilet was actually a toilet as opposed to a stinking hole in the ground. The squatty dude with the Lima t-shirt reminds me that I spent twice as much on the cab fare to find this Peruvian souvenir as I did the bear itself. The London bobby from the original restaurant recalls the fact I waited in line 2 hours for a table and a cheeseburger at this one. (We entertained ourselves by watching the Olympic torch come down the street.)

But it’s the one from Tokyo that really stands out. You see, he represents how I snookered my husband into spending  money we didn’t have for something stupid we didn’t need. It went like this: Japan was the last city on our 17-day whirlwind vacation, and we were out of money. Tokyo is expensive. So we spent the day watching CNN on the hotel television set, reading books and planning how to use the subway to go to Hard Rock Cafe for dinner as our big spend for the day.

During the trip to the restaurant, we wandered into one of those idle conversations about what we missed most about the United States. My list was short: whole milk. But I ended it with, “Well, what I haven’t missed is listening to your stupid John Denver albums.”

Yes, I am now convinced that was code for an ancient Asian curse because as we were slowly savoring our cheeseburgers and fries, who should walk in and take a seat at the table next to us but Mr. Denver himself? My husband, the most gregarious man on the planet, suddenly went shy and couldn’t say a word. But he did stop staring long enough to whisper that we ought to share a banana split so we could hold the table longer.

I’ve never turned down a banana split in my life.

After an hour of stalling, I finally decided this was beyond silly, grabbed my camera and walked over to John Denver’s table to confess that my husband was a big fan, and could we get a photo? Naturally, the answer was yes — the man was sitting in a Hard Rock Cafe, for crying out loud. He chose it to be recognized. My husband, with eyes as big as fried eggs, shook his hand and still couldn’t manage to mumble anything. But when the two turned to pose for the camera, I accidentally hit the flash button and caught the singer off guard. The photo reveals men looking bug-eyed and scared.

Handle with care

At this point, my husband was definitely enjoying a private Rocky Mountain High. As I wandered through the merchandise shop looking for my bear, he asked if there was anything else I’d want. Sure — those embroidered sweatshirts would be nice, don’t you think? A matching pair, of course. Next thing I knew, the man was standing at the cash register with his VISA card in hand, buying those suckers.

Now it was my turn to do the bug-eyed stare.

When we got back to the hotel, and my husband finally ran out of ways to describe to me how he’d met John Denver, he apparently thought gazing at his new sweatshirt would trigger a different angle to the memory. That’s when the receipt fell out of the bag, he did a quick calculation and …”JULIE! I JUST SPENT $110 ON SWEATSHIRTS!’ Uh, yes, dear, the price was clearly marked in big numbers on the tag, which is why I sarcastically joked that we should own them.

The sweatshirts now hang in our closet to be worn on special occasions — we dry-cleaned them for several years lest we ruin them in a regular old washer.  And we tell that story with almost every HRC we walk into, because while the food may be American, the memories from this chain are universal.

And my business finally paid off that VISA bill, too.

Photographer: Julie Sturgeon

The Burger Joint may be the last kind of place you’d expect to find in the lobby of the posh Le Parker Meridien hotel in New York City.  But that may be why it’s expertly hidden — the handmade, cockeyed menu boards and old naugahyde booths might stick out a bit amidst the lobby’s clean, fussy marble.

And this is part of the Joint’s charm.  New Yorkers, you see, seem to be on a never-ending quest to find the best burger in the city.  I know this because I saw it on an episode of “How I Met Your Mother.”  And the Burger Joint is definitely a contender for the honor.  If only because it is the kind of place that requires an insider’s knowledge mixed with a dash of adventure to find.

Enter the hotel, wander, and you’ll soon see it.  A small neon burger displayed on the wall, nearly hidden behind a large, red curtain shows you where to go.  And if that one small indicator of the Burger Joint’s location is obscured, then the line of hungry NYC natives, representing all walks of life from Wall Street to panhandler, happily queueing up behind it will surely point you in the right direction.

I’ve heard tell of the Burger Joint on several previous visits to the city.  But as soon as Le Parker Meridien was mentioned as the location, I’ll admit that I balked.  Not that I have anything against the hotel – it’s a gorgeous property with a great bar.  But, you know, I can get a $30 hotel burger just about anywhere in Manhattan and not have to go on what amounts to a quest to find it.  And I don’t have to wait in line in a dark, crowded hidey-hole for the privilege either.

But this time around, my host insisted.  “It’s the best burger in Manhattan,” he said.  “Plus, they have fantastic milkshakes.”  But it was his final sentence that sealed the deal for me.  “And the burgers are like only $7.00,” he exclaimed.  A $7 burger in New York City?  Was that even possible?  I had to find out.

And sure enough, it’s all true.  I don’t know if it is the “best” burger on the island – I don’t know if I can afford to sample them all – but it was really, really good.  But keep in mind that the Burger Joint is definitely a no muss-no fuss type of operation.  You stand in line, ask for a burger from a guy who aspires to be the Soup Nazi, pay in cash (and only in cash) and then hope against hope that you’ll manage to snag one of the few tables before your order is up.  If not, you’ll snarf your food standing against a fake wood-paneled wall adorned with a Sopranos poster, get some ketchup on your shirt in the process and like it.

But you know, maybe they put something in those burgers, because I’d happily return.  But this time, I’m holding out for a booth.

———-

The Burger Joint
Le Parker Meridien New York
119 W. 56th Street
New York, NY 10019

212.245.5000

http://www.parkermeridien.com/eat4.php

Hours:
Sunday through Thursday: 11:30-11:30
Friday and Saturday: 11:30-midnight

There are lots of Cheesecake Factory restaurants across the United States, with the bulk of them being in the Northeast and California. I’ve been to a few – and the giant menu is consistent across locations. My dream Cheesecake Factory has got to be the one in Honolulu because, well, that would mean I was in Hawaii to eat there. However, despite that I’ve been to only a small proportion of the existing Cheesecake Factory spots, I feel pretty comfortable saying that one of the most swankily-located ones is also my favorite so far. This is the Cheesecake Factory on San Vicente Blvd, in Brentwood, California.

Brentwood is on the west side of Los Angeles, and is as high end as the other nearby “B’s,” namely, Bel-Air

This Counts as a Vegetable, Right?

and Beverly Hills. There’s a very good chance that a guest will see semi-famous people enjoying their lunch here, which always adds a bit of a thrill to a meal. Even if you don’t recognize that dude in the sunglasses and Hugo Boss sports jacket, listen to him; he’s making movie deals as he eats. And that too-thin woman who still manages to polish off her whole pasta carbonara and then order a lemoncello cream torte? Don’t ask how she does it – it’s L.A., baby! The energy spent being a studio exec easily burns off that lunch.

Now, I’m not a studio executive in Brentwood, California, I’m just a foodie mom who loves treating my kids to fun meals (especially when I don’t have to cook them). My kids and I really have a good time at the Cheesecake Factory: They think it’s a super-fancy eatery because the bathrooms are clean – I raise them with low standards – and I enjoy watching my picky eater polish off a spinach and artichoke dip appetizer. In our house, that TOTALLY counts as a vegetable course. My older daughter usually orders a burger of some sort (pictured is the Factory

Hooray for the Factory Burger

Burger, with her celebrating it in the background). I like the Navajo – a sandwich on fry bread – blackened chicken sandwich, Factory Meatloaf, and many other high-calorie entrees. It’s probably a good thing I don’t live in Brentwood! Even the mac-n-cheese is fried. Yes, it’s good.

There are some very good, large salads and vegetable plates at Cheesecake Factory, but I am proud to say I haven’t tried any of them yet. I’ve seen them paraded by my table quite a lot of times, though. The closest I’ve come to healthy eating at a Cheesecake factory is either the aforementioned spinach artichoke dip (cheesy and creamy) or the fire-roasted artichoke. This last appetizer is really yummy, albeit messy and a bit spicy.

Brownie Sundae Cheesecake - the best of three desserts

A lunch or dinner at the Cheesecake Factory practically demands a cheesecake dessert, of course. Who am I to say no? While there is a “low carb” cheesecake (made with Splenda), what’s been eaten already was probably fried, creamy, or both. Might as well continue with the decadence. My last venture into cheesecake heaven was the brownie sundae cheesecake, pictured. The kids love a variety called peanut butter cup fudge ripple, and for a less heavy taste, the Key Lime cheesecake is tart and light. Well, lighter, anyway. This is cheesecake we’re talking about here.

Wherever you go to Cheesecake Factory, the appetizer, entree and dessert options are vast, and by and large quite tasty. While there is no “sense of place” at these restaurants (and admittedly, this is a dining aspect that is lost whenever we eat at chains), the quality and consistency are commendable. My family always has a great time at the Cheescake Factory.